Updated the choices for Nintendo Switch version, since the PC version uses keyboard numbers to make the choices.
Route is from Schir’s PC Any% notes found here: https://www.speedrun.com/west_of_loathing/guide/wyrgq
-Leave house. -Mash through dialogue for mom. -mash through dialogue for dad. -Grab a needle from the haystack. -Don't talk to your brother.
-Choose:Sure I’ll skip it, ThePale Horse, Accept name, Yes, Now Pick a Pardner, Take DocAlice, Sigh Yes, Very Compassionate, Start spending it manually
This should give you the correct pardner and horse (Doc Alice and Pale Horse), as well as Goblintongue and manual XP spending.
DIRTWATER -Talk to your pardner. -Go to the jail. -Choose Offer to help, Take your leave to get out of the conversation -Walk to the back and press A on the second poster. -Mash A -Go to the map -Head to Cavern Canyon.
CAVERN CANYON -Back to the map, wander. --Hope to god you get the Silversmith. --Failing that, hope to god you get Stearn's Ranch or Buttonwillow's Shop. --After getting one of those two, hope to god it's followed by the Silversmith. ---When both of those fail, curse at god and restart the run. --Alright, you're back with us? Finally got a run with those? Okay, cool.
-Go into Cavern Canyon's first cave, grab the wine, leave. -Go to the boards and pry them off. -Enter the second cave and pry the boards off the left door. -Leave cave 2, enter the far right cave. Press A when asked. -Walk over to the cocoons. Mash A.
DIRTWATER JAIL -Mash through the dialogue, travel to the Silversmith from the map.
SILVERSMITH -Get Moxie to 3, Hornswogglin' to 2. -Drink the decent wine, use the lockpicking book. -Enter house. -Ignore spittoon. -Go to bookshelf, unlock Silver Plater. -Go to map.
BUTTONWILLOW'S STORE/STEARN'S RANCH -Head to whichever of Buttonwillow's Store or Stearn's Ranch you've unlocked. Get two needles. --If Buttonwillow has only one needle, restart. --If your pardner has an exclamation point above their head, talk to them. -Go to map. -Head to the railroad.
RAILROAD 1 -Talk to the guy at the far left of the screen. -Talk to the guy with the bowler hat and glasses. Unlock Gustavson's Gulch. -Go to Gustavson's Gulch.
GUSTAVSON'S GULCH -Hornswoggle the mayor. -Head to the first building on the bottom.
--Choose: Go inside, How to Bird Noise, Stop -Go to the third building on the bottom from the left.
-Choose: Check it out, Check out the bed, check out the desk, read the important secrets, Nice -Go one building to the left along the bottom.
-Choose: Check it out, Look in drawer #69105, Leave -Go to the building that's up and two over. It should be the theater.
Choose: Head backstage, Keep watching, Nice -Go to the far building on the bottom side
Choose: Check out the inside, Pick the lock, head inside, nice
-Go to the cave at the far side of the map. Press A twice to enter. -Three goblins. Choose second option for each of their dialogs. -Open the two chests at the top on the far side of the cave for meat. Hope you got lucky with meat RNG. -Open the chest in the middle for dynamite. -Head back to the railroad.
RAILROAD 1 -Upgrade Hornswogglin' to 3. -Talk to the guy with bowler hat and glasses again.
Choose: Yep here you go, Sweet! -Press A on the switch. -Walk to the golem that shows up. Hornswoggle it -Walk back to the bowler hat glasses guy. Talk to him. -Open the map. -Head to railroad 2.
RAILROAD 2 -Talk to your pardner. Should unlock Reboot Hill. -Talk to the guy with the bowler hat and glasses, unlock Breadwood. -Head to Breadwood.
BREADWOOD -Talk to your pardner. You should unlock the Military Cemetery. -Enter the barracks. Talk to the guy to the right of the fireplace. Unlock the Petting Cemetery. ! Note: You'll probably have gotten the meateor event by this point. If you're under 5005 meat, sell a few items to the trading post here to get up to that point. ! --If you have 5005 meat, head to the Silver Plater, otherwise ignore this until you do.
SILVER PLATER -Talk to your pardner if they have an exclamation point. You should unlock Fort Alldead. -Get the turnip plated. Choose: What are my options?,Maybe Something else 3x, plate the turnip -Head to Fort Alldead.
FORT ALLDEAD -Enter the fort. -Walk over to the backpack at the far end just before the skeleton pit. -Get the Nex-Mex book from it. -Head to the Military Cemetery.
MILITARY CEMETERY -Walk up to the graves. -Choose Visit a plot, enter 666, , stop looting graves -Head to the Petting Cemetery.
PETTING CEMETERY -Talk to your pardner. You should unlock Buffalo Pile. -Head to Buffalo Pile.
BUFFALO PILE -Enter the pile. -Go one room to the right. -Grab a glass beaker, head to the milk container. Press A twice. -Go to the blood container, press A. -Go to the ichor container, press A. -Mash A. -Head to the next room. -Grab the key from the coat to the right of the ritual table. It's a bit hard to see, but it's between the table and the cell door. -Head to the next room. -Head to the next room. -Grab the Nex-Mex book from the table, then unlock the footlocker straight below the door. -Walk through the rooms until you get back to the room with the table and the cell door. -Grab the soldier bones from the cabinets on the right side of the screen. -Go to the ritual table. Mash A. -When Buffalo Buffalo Buffalo Bill's finished his speech, head back to the second railroad stop.
RAILROAD 2 -Use all 4 of the Nex-Mex books you've gotten. (the fourth one will have happened as an encounter on the world map by now) -Reopen your inventory after Doc Alice rudely interrupts your necromantic studies. -Finish learning dark magic. -Go over to the binoculars on the left side of the screen. Use them. Mash A. -Talk to the bowler hat glasses guy. Unlock Frisco. -Go to Frisco.
FRISCO -Talk to Emperor Norton. -Give him the crown. -Go to the movie theater. -Win the game.
END
