What are some games where the shortest category, and the truest any% by common definitions, is just.....kind of dumb? That's subjective, of course, but this might give you an idea of what I'm thinking of.
Far Cry 4 - you literally do nothing for about 20 minutes (depending on load times), then enter a building, interact with 1 node, and exit it.
Two Worlds - you attack a seemingly random NPC and lure him into a town where the townspeople kill him. Said NPC is in fact the final boss of the game, so his death triggers the credits.
Legend of Zelda Link to the Past - I'm not quite sure how this one works exactly, but you can end up in the final room of the game in under 2 minutes, without doing much of anything.
Any more games like these?
Zelda 1 has ACE where you start the second quest of the game, get the Flute, then go the Graveyard, spawn as many ghosts as the game can handle and then Flute + swing your sword on the right set of frames (based on the music) with certain ghosts having certain speed values and you teleport to Zelda. How it works is that blowing the Flute spawns a staircase in the graveyard and if the sprite limit is already maxed out, then the game attempts to load the staircase over one of the ghosts with a speed value of 0. The result is a jump instruction and your filenames get run as code and with the right filenames, you end up at Zelda. It's technically listed on the LBs as "Any% ACE" but it's still Any%.
Final Fantasy 1 (Famicom) has something similar. With the right filenames, you climb the first set of stairs in the game 70 times. Then you talk to a guard, save, and reset the console. You enter new filenames, reset, reload and climb the stairs 70 more times. After that, you talk to the guard again and you wind up in the final boss fight at which point you can just run away to beat the game.
As a side note [QUOTE]Legend of Zelda Link to the Past - I'm not quite sure how this one works exactly, but you can end up in the final room of the game in under 2 minutes, without doing much of anything.[/QUOTE] If you're curious how this works, the easiest way to think about it is that the game as two layers - a top layer and a bottom layer. You can enter this bottom layer through a variety of measures (easiest of which is jumping off a ledge, S+Q in midair, reload and go take damage). Once you're on this bottom layer, you can walk almost anywhere, even to the Triforce room past Ganon as long as you know the directions to walk. We call it Exploration Glitch.
To expand on Crash 2- there are 3 any% categories. Any% no game over abuse, Any% game over abuse, and Any% item glitch (true any%). There's also a partial save corruption-y thing that can allow saving over a completed file and ending up in the final boss, but this is treated as NG+ and not tracked due to being trivial.
NOGO is the "standard" category of going through all 25 levels to get the crystals, beating a boss every 5. GO abuse does the same, but you can get a game over after collecting a crystal and it still counts as collected, as long as another level is completed. So you can enter a level, get the crystal, game over, repeat 4 times and then complete the 5th level and you'll get all 5 crystals. Any%, however, enters Snow Go, bounces on a box 200 times, abuses spin-crouching to maintain a bounce combo, and then kills 24 (25?) seals to get 25 crystals. This works due to consecutive bounces giving more wumpa fruit and then a life, and 200 indexes past the start is where crystals are stored in memory.
Spyro: Enter the Dragonfly has a lengthy loading screen, a cutscene skip, a loading screen, 3-4 seconds of movement to skip into the final boss, a loading screen, and then a dumb boss.
CTR any% involves tripping the credits from within battle mode by completing 19 matches- this is best done by making player 2 suicide on beakers repeatedly.
Mario Kart: Double Dash!!'s any% speedrun is silly, out of the four cups you only complete the two last ones with a meh kart, and the definition doesn't make that much of a sense anyway
Sonic Adventure 2's any% pushes it to the next level, you have to complete 40 times the same stage in the same way everytime in order to make a wrong warp glitch work (see from 10 minutes in this run: )
Oh that Sonic entry reminds me of ChromaGun. It's been patched now, but the literal any% for the game exploits a bug in level transition loads. If you reset while the next level is loading, you do the previous one over again (but the game "thinks" you're advancing further in the game). So if you do the....8th room, I think it is....53 straight times (it takes about 15 seconds each time) you go to the last room of the game afterward.